TOP DRAWER INK NEWSLETTER

 

Here's the latest issue of Top Drawer Ink, the newsletter written by author HL Carpenter that's chock full of humor and common sense information.

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December 6, 2008
Volume 6, Number 23
ISSN 1554-6330

In this issue:

1. Carpenter Country Essay

2. Top Drawer Article

3. Top Drawer Tips

4. Top Drawer Satire

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CARPENTER COUNTRY

What's Happening in Our Neck of the Human Experience

Maybe you’ve heard the saying you only appreciate a thing after you’ve lost it.

Well, here in Carpenter Country, the short one can agree with that. She didn’t appreciate her semi-deafness until she began using hearing aids.

That may sound weird, but for quite awhile the world’s noises fell very quietly on her audio-deprived ears. After she acquired hearing aids, quiet became clamor.

At home, the dishwasher rattled. The washing machine groaned. The dryer whistled. The microwave and the stove beeped, thankfully not in unison.

To get away from the din she went to the mall and found the parking lot decorated with muted holiday cheer. But inside loudspeakers blared messages to employees, salesclerks rattled money and Santa jingled his bell, which was okay until the little kids began screaming for candy.

Back in her car, the rumble of her stomach told her she was hungry. Unfortunately, even without hearing aids, most restaurants are noisy places. With good hearing the rattling dishes and scraping chairs sound even louder.

Then there was the music be-bopping from hidden speakers. True, the volume was high for a reason. It made people eat faster and clear out more quickly – a strategy the short one was just about to agree worked – when suddenly the noise level dropped and roars became whispers.

What was going on?

She touched her ears. She still had her hearing aids in.

But – ah, bliss - the batteries had died.

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TOP DRAWER ARTICLE

Identity Theft and Your Business

by
HL Carpenter

These days you don’t have to look far to find stories of identity theft caused by breaches of business data. Could it happen to you? Have you taken steps to secure the information your company collects?

Read the entire article here

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TOP DRAWER TIPS
Topics and Tidbits

Tip: The National Institute of Standards and Technology, an agency of the US Department of Commerce, offers half-day workshops on information and computer security for small businesses. The workshops are conducted in partnership with the Small Business Administration and the Federal Bureau of Investigation. Times and dates are listed on the Institute’s web site.

Glossary Term: Information security. A comprehensive system of policies, controls, technology and procedures designed to protect and safeguard the availability, integrity and privacy of information and information systems. Physical components may include firewalls, passwords, encryption and digital certificates.

Financial Horoscope: Does the grim economic outlook have you boxing up your jolly holiday spirit? Give yourself an early gift and release that happy inner self. Personal transformation can be fun – as long as it’s your idea. To keep others from transforming into you by stealing your identity, check your credit report at least twice a year.

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TOP DRAWER SATIRE

Doom and Gloom

by
HL Carpenter

Celebrity media darlings Doom and Gloom will sing a new version of an old song this Saturday at the Economic Recession Jam in Washington DC.

Read the rest here