TOP DRAWER INK NEWSLETTER

 

Here's the latest issue of Top Drawer Ink, the newsletter written by author HL Carpenter that's chock full of humor and common sense information.

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September 19, 2009
Volume 7, Number 18
ISSN 1554-6330

In this issue:

1. Carpenter Country
2. Top Drawer Article
3. Top Drawer Tips
4. Top Drawer Satire

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CARPENTER COUNTRY
What's Happening in Our Neck of the Human Experience

 

Continuing the Carpenter Country saga that ended with: ... just before she noticed the kitchen faucet was leaking ...

Several different forms of repair were tried, but the leak dripped on and soon became a puddle. At that point, Home Fix-it got another visit and a new faucet was purchased.

“Done at last,” the repairman said, after the installation. And when nothing broke or collapsed for two whole seconds, he grabbed his pole and went fishing.

Right after he left, the short one decided to replace the still-damp shelf paper covering the bottom of the sink’s cabinet.

Scissors in hand, she lowered herself to the floor, wiggled her head and shoulders into the narrow space. Boy, this is a tight squeeze, she thought. Either the cabinet has shrunk or I’ve gotten wider.

From then on things didn’t get any better. When she tried to measure and cut, the paper rolled up. When she finally managed to push the long sheet into the rear corner, the edges curled under. And when she thought the end of the job was in sight, it really wasn’t - since the backing still had to be peeled off.

After five long minutes, she managed to slip a fingernail between the edges of the paper and peel away the underlayer. But before she could press the gluey coating to the cabinet floor, it stuck to itself.

Then, like fly paper - it stuck to her.

As the short one tried to wrestle the gummy layers into submission, she heard the back door open - then an abrupt silence - followed by a laugh, a sigh, a sob and a disbelieving, “What the...heck!”

Needless to say, there are no more home repair jobs planned for this year.

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TOP DRAWER ARTICLE

New Old Tax Scams
by
HL Carpenter

 

Getting scammed is no fun – and knowing what scamsters are up to can help keep you safe.

Here are four common identity theft scams the IRS wants you to be aware of.

Read the entire article here

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TOP DRAWER TIPS
Topics and Tidbits

 

Tip: Protect your privacy online by learning how to remove cookies, secure your email, hide your Web browsing, and shop safely. OnGuardOnline, a dot-org web site sponsored by the US government and dedicated to teaching internet safety, offers videos and tips to get you started.

Glossary Term: Cross-Border scams. When con artists target citizens of other countries. Generally the scamsters believe they are less likely to be pursued and get caught. However, law enforcement is responding. In the US, the SAFEWEB Act enables the Federal Trade Commission to more easily cooperate with foreign law enforcement agencies to combat global fraud schemes.

Financial Horoscope: Fall officially arrives this month with the autumnal equinox. Night and day are exactly the same length, cooler temperatures are on the way, and it’s a good time to take a walk through your credit report. Get your free copy and make sure no crook has hijacked your credit rating.

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TOP DRAWER SATIRE

Inconvenience Matters
by
HL Carpenter

 

Even as local, state and federal governments struggle to close budget gaps by curtailing nonessential activities such as education, driver’s licenses and health clinics, one service continues to escape the chopping block: Inconvenience.

Read the rest here