TOP DRAWER INK NEWSLETTER

 

Here's the latest issue of Top Drawer Ink, the newsletter written by author HL Carpenter that's chock full of humor and common sense information.

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August 6, 2011
Volume 9, Number 15
ISSN 1554-6330

In this issue:

1. Carpenter Country Essay

2. Top Drawer Article

3. Top Drawer Tips

4. Top Drawer Satire

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CARPENTER COUNTRY

What's Happening in Our Neck of the Human Experience

Sometimes things need to be tuned up.

That's why, after the painless procedure of having my hearing aids adjusted for better sound quality, I'd continued my maintenance regime by calling the doctor's office for a physical. Happily the results turned out to be trouble-free, too.

So now I was sitting in the dentist's chair, about to have a molar filled. This was the last item on my list and I'd been ignoring it all summer because the whine of the drill always made me cringe.

Why am I doing this? I wondered. I could be swimming in one of Carpenter Country's cool springs, taking a boat ride or tubing down the river ...

My thoughts were cut off as the drill descended and started whirring. Wow, that thing was loud!

I tried not to squirm, but I must have stiffened.

"Are you okay?" the dentist asked.

Since my mouth was packed with cotton, the assistant's fingers, and gadgets too numerous to mention, talking was out of the question. I nodded instead.

Once again the drill rocked my brain, the noise cutting through my head like a buzz-saw. I blinked, gagged and finally waved my hands.

The dentist backed away. "What's the matter?"

"The drill," I gurgled. "It's ear-splitting."

A frown creased her brow. "Can't be," she said. "This is the quietest model they make."

I sat up straighter, ready to argue ... and that's when I realized what the problem was.

I'd forgotten to remove my recently fine-tuned, perfectly adjusted, hearing aids.

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TOP DRAWER ARTICLE

The US House of Representatives

by
HL Carpenter

Two hundred and twenty four years ago, America's founding fathers agreed that Congress should be divided into two chambers, the Senate and the House of Representatives. Two years later, in 1789, the House of Representatives was formed.

Click here to read the rest of this article

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TOP DRAWER TIPS
Topics and Tidbits

Tip: The Senate Finance Committee is the US Senate's counterpart to the House of Representative's Committee on Ways and Means. Created in 1816, the Finance Committee sets tax policy, as well as initiating and overseeing legislation on Social Security, trade, and health care.

Glossary Term: Joint Committee on Taxation. A committee created by the Revenue Act of 1926 to help Congress write tax laws. Made up of five members of the House Ways and Means Committee and five members of the Senate Finance Committee, the Joint Committee on Taxation has a permanent, non-partisan staff that works with Congress to prepare tax bills and describe proposals and revenue estimates.

Financial Horoscope: So what if everyone says taxes are complex? You're equal to the task of figuring out what applies to you, both financially and otherwise. Be practical and pick the best options.

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TOP DRAWER SATIRE

Brinkmanship

by
HL Carpenter

To the relief of a worldwide audience, the final round in the American political game of Brinkmanship, known as the Debt Debacle, ended earlier in the week after a bruising month of play. Both teams in this year's event suffered injuries and will take August off to recover.

Click here to read the rest of this satire