TOP DRAWER SATIRE
Hot Air
by
HL Carpenter
As fuel prices rise, overwhelmed consumers are seeking alternative power sources to heat homes and businesses. Congressional Gas Company, a Washington based utility, thinks the answer is clear: Harness the inexhaustible supply of hot air emanating from the nation’s lawmakers.
“Like most ideas that come from Washington, it’s a no-brainer,” says B. Low Hard, company spokesperson. “This fuel is as plentiful and cheap as political promises.”
Energy technology specialists say the concept is sound. Unlike methane gas, which is tapped from decomposing garbage in landfills and has a finite lifespan, politicians are expected to continue to spew hot air into the foreseeable future. In addition, while newer fuel alternatives such as corn are sometimes difficult to find and store, nearly every town has a legislative board of some type.
Outside experts agree that political hot air could help offset higher energy prices. They also point out Congress may enact the same subsidies and tax benefits that are available to other alternative fuels to help drive costs down even more.
Congressional Gas Company has plans to start a national discussion on the topic once the US Senate and House return from hiatus in late January. According to Ms. Hard, the company is hoping for a heated debate.
Originally published January 2006.
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HL Carpenter, an experienced investor and a CPA, specializes in reader friendly financial and tax topics for individuals and small businesses, and publishes Top Drawer Ink, a newsletter that's chock full of humor and common sense information.
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Last update: January 9, 2011
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